I've just sat down to write a post-- a report on the weekend Christmas market, some funny anecdotes, festive photos, but then, as background noise to write by, I put on NPR. Of course the whole programming was on the tragedy in Connecticut. Background noise. I'm finding it tough right now to be amusing or festive.
It is so very very sad. My heart breaks for the mourning families of the killed, for the school that will never get past this, for the community struggling to understand. But most of all, my heart is breaking for a country, my country, my country that is quite obviously in a state of depression.
I don't mean economic depression. I'm talking about social, emotional, and spiritual depression. When a person exhibits self destructive behaviours, all alarms go off that this person needs help. I think the same must be true for a country. Mass shooting of children and teachers at a school is rather self destructive for a society.
I'm writing this from my home, my current life in a country that is not the one that I claim as mine. Perhaps this gives me no right to complain or criticize, to cast stones. No, not perhaps -- I have no right.
And my heart is still breaking.