Friday, April 24, 2009

Following up on the last post...I might actually have lost my mind in that little hiatus in which I was unplugged. I've just returned from running around the terraces of land outside my house screaming in , "I'M AN IDIOT!!! YIPPEEEEE! I'M AN IDIOT!!!"

Yeah, that's a pretty sure sign that while not having any contact with the outside world the deck lost a few cards behind the bookshelf, or a few of the bulbs disconnected from the current, or maybe that the lights are on in the living room but no one's on the couch knitting.

Earlier today I found myself sitting in front of a brand new computer, one day new in Casa Cornwell, staring at a screen that told me my brand new wi-fi was not available. Not just not available, not even on the radar. My wi-fi said otherwise, with its row of beautifully flashing green and orange lights, "here I am! sending out wonderfully high speed vibes!" No communication between the two - none. Just like that between parents and teenagers - both entities emitting, neither receiving.


After a 10 euro phone conversation with my wi-fi provider company, in which we explored every nook and cranny of my two new best-electrical friends - Katy Computer and Rodney Router - they politely told me that A)I was on my own with this problem because it was the computer and not the router making trouble, and b. I was fucked.


So I packed up my new roommate with all her cords and warranty and backup disks and went back to the store she came from. I had no intention of returning her...she's part of the family now (another red flag that my sack of marbles might be missing its shooter). I went straight to the guy who sold her to me, taking mental note of the anticipation of displeasure that came across his face as he speculated on what was wrong with my computer.

Let me interrupt myself here...the guys that work at this shop (think Circuit City but smaller and with salesmen who speak italian and had never touched a computer prior to landing their job) are, well, not helpful. Not too many of them seem particularly happy to be there, nor at all knowledgeable of their products, and are all but too keenly aware of the lack of advancement prospects in their future. Not the best combo when you are the customer.

Having said that, (let's call the shop assistant helping me "John") Giovanni welcomed me with a big (kind of) smile and asked if there was a problem with my new Katy, um, computer.

I explained the non-communication issue between my technical appliances at which point Giovanni fessed up to knowing nothing about how any of that works.


"But let's just turn it (HER!) on and see what's going on."

Giovanni opened her up, pressed the button right next to the "on" button that says "wi-fi" and it lit up.

"Devi premere qui 'wi-fi'. Capito? PUSH wi-fi button" Yes, he actually translated the words into english for me...push wi-fi button.

"no light, no wi-fi. push button, light, wi-fi."

Apparently prior physical contact with an actual computer is not a pre-requisite for not being an idiot.


As I sheepishly packed my new pal (the computer, not Giovanni) back into the paper sack she came in from the box, Giovanni gave me a big smile and said, "and if that doesn't work, you can come back at 3.30 when Paolo the technician is here to get him to fix the computer while I sell you a proper carrying case for that computer."


Just to prove that I'm happily an idiot and that now all my technology is on speaking terms, I'll share a taste of how I've passed the time whist unplugged...there's too much for one post, so we'll start here:

Ladies knitting...

Natalie and Christine

Christine with her first FO:

Natalie's beautiful new sweater (she made the buttons too!)


  1. Anonymous7:11 AM

    Dear Lynn, I'm going to scrape the bumper sticker off my car and bequeath it to you. It reads... " Of all the things that I have lost in this life, I miss my mind the most" Paolo Giorgio Cornwelli

  2. Oh, it so good to hear from you again. The fence looks great by the way. Wish I could have been there to help you with the computer. I'm a lot cheaper, just a glass of local Italian wine.
    I must finish reading the rest of your entries, ciao - Earle